Saturday, 12 January 2013
Well I do, and truthfully, I thought I'd never be able to play dress-ups without enduring public ridicule until I recently received an invite to a friend's eighteenth birthday - the ultimate free pass!
The theme is Disney - to dress as any character that takes your fancy, and honestly, I thought (and still think) this is the most exciting concept on the planet. Not only does the thirty year old (me) get to hang out with the young-ins on a pub crawl, but I also get to trawl through Google images in search of the perfect Disney ensemble and spend hubby's money buying it.
Anyway, I decided on Pocahontas on account of my long, dark hair and the fact that I'd rather wear a loin cloth in the decidedly feral summer heat than pour myself into a ball gown and call myself a princess.
With the decision made, I was aghast when a new piece of information was sent via text, crumbling my Disney fantasy. Not only was I supposed to be a seemingly innocent tribal daughter, hugging trees and whispering to the wind and all that crap but apparently now I was supposed to be slutty one at that! I mean, how on earth do you make Pocahontas look easy? Show John Smith my furs?
Yes, the looming question mark of whether or not I will actually debase Walt Disney's beloved character is still a mystery. I suspect after a few hours of cocktails and three bucketfuls of sweat staining the armpits of my new outfit that Pocahontas may just take a few clothes off merely to avoid expiration.
Watch this space ...